TED演讲：36个问题让一个人爱上你
演讲者参加了一个心理测试:与另一位被测者一起回答设定好的36个问题。神奇的是，测试后他们两个竟然相爱了。既然这不是童话故事，那么让他们在短时间内迅速相爱的原因是什么呢?
演讲者:Mandy Len Catron
Ipublished this article in the New York Times Modern Love column in January of this year. "To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This." And the article is about a psychological study designed to create romantic love in the laboratory, and my own experience trying the study myself one night last summer.
So the procedure is fairly simple: two strangers take turns asking each other 36 increasingly
personal questions and then they stare into each other's eyes without speaking for four minutes.So here are a couple of sample questions.
过程很简单:两个陌生人轮流问对方36个问题，问题越来越私人化，然后四目相对，一言不发地对视4分钟。我选出了其中几个问题。
Number 12: If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
Number 28: When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
问题12:如果你明早醒来能获得一项品质或能力，你希望是什么?
问题28:你上一次当着别人的面哭是什么时候? (上一次)独自哭泣呢?爱上别人的人 符号
As you can see, they really do get more personal as they go along.
Number 30, I really like this one: Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time,saying things you might not say to someone you just met.
如大家所见， 这些问题的确越来越私人化。
问题30，我很喜欢这一个:告诉对面的人你喜欢他(她)什么，要非常诚实，说一些你也许不会对初次见面的人说的话。
So when I first came across this study a few years earlier, one detail really stuck out to me, and that was the rumor that two of the participants had gotten married six months later, and they'd invited the entire lab to the ceremony.So I was of course very skeptical about this process of just manufacturing romantic love, but of course I was intrigued.
因此当我几年前偶然听说这个实验的时候，有一个细节真的打动了我，我听到传言，说有两个参加实验的人在半年后结婚了，他俩邀请了整个实验团队去参加婚礼。当然，我非常怀疑这种完全人造的浪漫爱情，但同时我也很好奇。
And when I got the chance to try this study myself, with someone I knew but not particularly well, I wasn't expecting to fall in love. But then we did, and --And I thought it made a good story, so I sent it to the Modern Love column a few months later.
当我自己也有机会去完成这个实验时--和一个我认识但不是很熟的人--我完全没想到我们会陷入爱河。但是我们真的陷进去了，而且--我认为这是一个精彩的故事，所以几个月后，我将它发给了 “现代爱情”专栏。
Now, this was published in January, and now it is August, so I'm guessing that some of you are probably wondering, are we still together? And the reason I think you might be wondering this is because I have been asked this question again and again and again for the past seven months. And this question is really what I want to talk about today. But let's come back to it.
今年一月，文章发表了，现在是八月份，所以我想你们中间肯定有人在想，我俩是不是还在一起?我之所以知道你们想问，是因为过去七个月里，我已经被问了无数次。我今天真的想回答这个问题。但是让我们先说说别的。
So the week before the article came out, I was very nervous. I had been working on a book about love stories for the past few years, so I had gotten used to writing about my own experiences with romantic love on my blog. But a blog post might get a couple hundred vie
ws at the most, and those were usually just my Facebook friends, and I figured my article in the New York Times would probably get a few thousand views. And that felt like a lot of attention on a relatively new relationship. But as it turned out, I had no idea.
在文章发表前一周，我非常紧张。我一直在写一本关于爱情的书，已经好几年了，我已经习惯于在我的博客上分享我自己的爱情经历。然而博客可能最多只有几百人在看，而且大多数是我“脸书”上的好友，而我发表到《纽约时报》上的文章，可能会有几千人看。对一段刚刚确定的关系而言，关注的人有点太多了(不是件好事儿)。但对随之而来的事情，我毫无准备。
So the article was published online on a Friday evening, and by Saturday, this had happened to the traffic on my blog. And by Sunday, both the Today Show and Good Morning America had called.Within a month, the article would receive over 8 million views, and I was, to say the least,underprepared for this sort of attention. It's one thing to work up the confidence to write honestlyabout your experiences with love, but it is another thing to discover that your love life has made international news --and to realize that people across the world are genuinely invested in the status of your new relationship.
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